Wednesday, February 27, 2019

Some Strange Force Awakened Me

On Sunday I mentioned here about making my way through Star Wars: The Force Awakens -- at that point to the 77 minute mark. I kept my mouth shut at the time, but the reality is I had a bad feeling about it.

Last night I pushed my way right through to 127 minutes. My cut out happened when I heard a baton waving over the end credits.

What a load of rubbish. With a lame villain and a skiff-full of flat characters. (A trash compactor?) I knew they were Star Wars characters because their cute little outfits said so.

By the way, the actress who played Rey had a bad habit of glancing at the camera lens.

Han Solo gets offed. That I did not know. I got the feeling it was done to shock the audience rather than with any regard or plan for the greater franchise story arc.

Guys. It's a lightsaber, not a hand phaser.

In my previous piece I noted that TFA feels like an "elaborate fan film". A friend told me afterward that he thought my point was a good one. Seeing the (off) balance of the flick last night convinced me my friend is right.

I'm now done with Star Wars. I was done with it during a DVD's opening crawl of 1999's Star Wars: The Phantom Menace, but I slipped a little bit. However, the franchise will continue on without my interest. My advice: Get an intellectual director in there. The fanboy (sounds like) baggage has to go.

"If we can destroy the oscillator, it might destabilize the core and cripple the weapon." Oh, please, show me how!


(Forgot to mention: Many Sarcasticans died to bring us that review.)


2 comments:

Dominic M said...

If you're wondering about Han Solo, its that Harrison Ford hated being dragged back into the franchise and wanted out. I blame the Christmas Special!

Oh, love the "Sarcasticans" line!

Simon St. Laurent said...

Thank you! From the planet Sarcastica.

Harrison Ford wanted out? I'm not surprised to hear that.

Don't blame the Christmas Holiday Special. On my list it's just a notch below The Empire Strikes Back.