Post Happy Halloween Humour Post

Many times over the years I've been told that I'm very funny... not in an odd way, although I would have no problem promoting that idea, but in making people laugh.

"Man, you should be doing comedy."

"You're on the wrong end of a camera." (When I worked in the film/tv business.)

"You should have your own show."

"Absolutely effortless."

I'll summarize with this cute little exchange between two Film Effects workers:

Mark: You're hilarious! You know that Yuk Yuk's has an 'Amateur Night'.

Me: (In my best Jonathan Harris as Dr Zachary Smith) Amateur Night? Indeed!

(Mark laughed.)

We are influenced to some degree by our parents. While my mum was hardly humourless, my dad had an at times twisted sense of humour.

Dad: Simon.

Me: Yeah.

Dad: You should rent yourself out to haunt homes.

Should one's parents be saying something like that to their kid?

The answer is: "Yes! They should!"

Thanks, dad. I am forever grateful.

Shari-Lee: You're so warped!

I was glowing. And I still am....

Beware of the 'Trick or Treat' Monster!

Happy Halloween!

He/She/It loves candy.

The How to Enjoy Experimental Film Podcast Soon

While working here at home this week I put the How to Enjoy Experimental Film podcast on continuous play, starting with the first episode, and eventually going through a couple dozen more. Daniel Adams, an Englishman, produces and hosts that most excellent show. In university he studied music, film, and theatre, giving him the tools to discuss the experimental film form with his many guests. Such accreditation might not be necessary to cover underground, avant-garde, and non-narrative moving-image works, but that loaded combination does put one at an advantage. 

For some time I've been planning to write a piece on How to Enjoy Experimental Film.

Postscript: In preparation for this piece, I checked Daniel Adams' bio on his Facebook page; he attended the University of Reading. I've been to Reading ("Redding")... lovely town.

Notebook Sketches: Website Layout Concepts

Notebooks everywhere, most of which are well scribbled... and sketched, as the above. This particular spiral notebook measures 6" by 9", and it's almost completely full.

A writer writes, constantly. Flipping through and reading one's notebooks is actually a lot of fun. What were we thinking and writing about back then? The above "then" is "June 22, 2000". My word!

The sketches are of website ideas for a 35mm short film I was making at the time. Certain financial considerations left Hyper-Reality unfinished. The good news is, I have some website ideas!

Graphic Humour/Humor from Bluesky ― Blue Skies

One day, you'll hear

cell phones going off.

Then shouting and cheering.

In the distance, car horns

will begin to honk.

A stranger might buy everyone

a round at the bar where

you're sitting.

And without anyone saying a word,

you'll know:

Me: ... and we Torontonians will definitely, and confidently, scratch "The Toronto Maple Leafs won the Stanley Cup!" off the "Possible Answers" list.

Sketch: Seven Seconds in Man

A piece of scrap paper was lying around and the idea of tossing it without rendering something was reprehensible to me. A ballpoint pen made a man in seven seconds.

I needed a little longer to become a man... and I was made with the non-commitment of pencil and graphite, not a man guaranteed by pen and ink. After all, the very thought of an ink eraser....

It's Election Day in this Great City

About an hour ago I cast my vote(s) in the City of Toronto elections, and was impressed with the turnout at my polling station at Alliance Française Toronto. There was a lot of young people voting!

I love this city, and its "Ward 11".

Video File: Toronto Pig Save Crew (23/07/2015) Clip

This past Thursday I posted two pieces containing clips from a Toronto Pig Save shoot I did eleven years ago. As I noted in the first post, I plan to edit this footage footage into a short video... now that I've unconsciously uncovered the original camera card I was using at that time.

The above is a short trim from that day/evening.

Video File: Toronto Pig Save Crew (23/07/2015) Part 2

This morning I posted a video clip from a shoot I did eleven years ago. I also posted the piece on Facebook: about an hour ago I was notified that Video File: Toronto Pig Save Crew (23/07/2015) had garnered 200 plays. Even I'm impressed.

The woman featured front and centre here is, as I noted in my previous post: "Anita Krajnc, a legend in 'animal rights' circles."

Video File: Toronto Pig Save Crew (23/07/2015)

On July 23rd of 2015 I finally made an appearance at a Toronto Pig Save vigil. A friend at the time encouraged me to pay a visit. It took sixteen months to take the bow, but I did it: having my place of employment just a few minutes up the road from the Ontario Stockyards did not hurt.

I took my Canon video camera along for the experience and managed to shoot a few minutes of Pig Save action. To be perfectly honest, while I thought the TPS crew had their hearts in the right place, I felt that their actions did little to accomplish anything... other than annoying truck drivers and the front-of-house slaughterhouse crew. These palaces of death tend to be off the beaten path: in this case, Ethel Avenue is not exactly a high traffic area; protests seen by no one, except by those being protested, and they really don't care, unfortunately.

The lady in the light-blue T-shirt is Anita Krajnc, a legend in 'animal rights' circles.

I found this clip along with others on a misfiled camera card while I was doing some organizing here at home yesterday afternoon. I've not seen these raw video bits in a few years. Looking at this footage now may prompt me to cut together a short documentary piece. For years I've had a specific idea for how I would want to end it. Viewers who get the reference might find it humorous.

Also on that card are scenes from an old friend's birthday party. If I remember correctly, pork was served that afternoon. It's a sick joke, I know.

Do we really love pigs?

Alice Li for University-Rosedale (Toronto Elections)

A 'door hanger' awaited my return from running some errands....

Alice Li

― FOR ―

UNIVERSITY-ROSEDALE

I remember when I became aware of this lady. One day, as I made my way down the TTC's  "Spadina" pedestrian tunnel, a vibrant tune filled the air. There stood, more like hopping with some wattage, a young woman tickling some ivories. As always I was equipped with my trusty Canon camera, but any thoughts of capturing a talented musician were stopped cold: I was laden with shopping bags and a hot coffee.

Months later I made a connection when I learned of Ms Li and her campaign to become Councilor for Toronto's Ward 11 ― my ward. A talented musician is one thing, an understanding of politics can be another. Well, I was impressed almost immediately. She is a big supporter of the TTC and public transit, issues very important to me as I depend on the Toronto Transit Commission and its fleet of sporty vehicles to move me within this great city. There's more, of course, including her love for a sense of community. For years I've lived in the beautiful "Annex" neighbourhood, and I wish to keep it that way, beautiful, and even make it more. (The threat of crackerbox condos popping up in this community concerns me. Why? "Urban Planning" would seem to be a threatening term to some developers, and certain Toronto City Council members.)

Election Day is this coming Monday (October 26th). Alliance Française de Toronto is my polling station, and I must back up my words by marking my ballot with an "X" for "Alice Li".

Photo Art: The Screem

Picturing: Hello, Doll!

Hear the children's chorus....

"Laaa, la

   Laaa, la"

Me More Steven Wright or Mitch Hedberg?

"He's so fat his briefs need suspenders."

Either/or?

A Sample from my Dad's Operational Record Book

The postings on this blog with some of the biggest hit counts are those regarding RAF Bomber Command No. 626 Squadron, with which my father flew during the war.  I thought it time to add a little more information regarding his operational record.

Here is a partial list ― culled from material provided to me by Dave Stapleton of The 626 Squadron Research Project ― of "ops" flown by Flying Officer A.R. Screen and crew:

Date - Target - Notes

12 March 1945 - Dortmund

13 March 1945 - Herne - The target was a Benzol Plant

23 March 1945 - Bremen Bridge

14 April 1945 - Potsdam

22 April 1945 - Bremen - Mission abandoned on Master Bomber’s orders.

25 April 1945 - Berchtesgaden - Hitler’s Eagles Nest in Bavaria (specifically, the SS Barracks)

With the Allied forces now advancing well into Germany, Bomber Command now turned its attention to humanitarian sorties and 626 Squadron was similarly tasked. (The Squadron’s Lancasters were converted to carry sacks of food in the bomb bays. Each aircraft carried 284 sacks; these were dropped from 500ft.) The crew flew two of these sorties:

30 April 1945 - Rotterdam - Operation Manna

2 May 1945 - Rotterdam - Operation Manna

Special thanks to:

Dave Stapleton

The 626 Squadron Research Project

Copyright 2010 ©

Postscript: Years ago I told a friend about how young these guys were who flew in RAF Bomber Command. My dad was nineteen; his crewmates would have been that age or a year or two older. I joked with my buddy that if this particular aircrew was known for doing something special during the war, and a movie were made about their experiences, the guy in the role of my dad would probably be an actor in his late twenties or early thirties. And Flying Officer Screen would no doubt be played by someone like Johnny Depp.

Film and television producers, who aren't known for being a particularly bright lot to begin with, much too often miss on details like the above.

John Waters on Make Trouble Humour

Much of what filmmaker/writer John Waters says makes me laugh. The same would be true of Woody Allen. (Much of what they say rings true.)

In 2015 Mr Waters delivered a commencement speech to graduates at the Rhode Island School of Design, and his patented, at times subversive, sense of humour made his life advice go viral.

I, of course, was not surprised.

Courtesy of John Waters - Make Trouble (Algonquin Books of Chapel Hill). Some:

"Okay, I'm supposed to inspire you. How's this? Somehow I've been able to make a living doing what I love best for fifty years without even having to get a real job."

Close to home:

"A career in the arts is like a hitchhiking trip: All you need is one person to say 'get in', and off you go. And then the confidence begins.

Poem: Time Merchants

This morning I coffeed

on Yonge Street               
with an old friend
caught up on
issues since

I last saw him
last week

He and I disbanded:
My friend went back
to his conference and
I decided
to do something I
rarely do
anymore

walk up Yonge

"Look at all the
bloody
Vertical
Cracker
Boxes!
(going up
or already spiking
the cloudy sky)"

This town is out of
control
Zoning going to
The Twilight Zone

Yonge Street has
changed
much these last few years
helped
by Premium stacks
sprouting
from holes

Before I made it
to Bloor Street I
was stopped by

a woman selling
something
in front of a shop

Cosmetics
Me?

Why not?....

No, I
don't use facial moisturizers
but I should

Perhaps
I could

The sales lady was
in top form
having worked a little sales

I know the bad
and
the good

The cosmetic's test was done
on my forearm
but
I can imagine

With every peek into the bathroom
mirror my imagination tweaks
with age

** return **

Bloor Street
away

less

eventful

___

2016
Simon St. Laurent

CD from the Shelf: The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

While I did a quick scan of my CD shelves yesterday a certain disc caught my eye. Right away I realized I had not played it in years (25?). Without hesitation I fired up the Sony and the Samsung.

Great stuff. Ennio Morricone's classic score for the 1966 action-western flick The Good, The Bad & The Ugly is deserving of its status: being attached to a terrific and entertaining film by Sergio Leone does not hurt... in fact it only helps place it high on the shelf. (I've long said that film scores in the public record are those associated with films of some popularity. There are so many outstanding scores that play to enthusiasts only due to their binding to motion pictures forgotten, or never even noticed in their original release.)

That sound!

That timbre!

Those voices!

Not of Hollywood!

Writing this brief piece reminds me that I also have the composer's tracks for director Leone's Once Upon a Time in the West, also unplayed in many years. Back to the shelves....

Quote: Rod Serling on That Ugly

"I think that the singular evil of our time is prejudice. It is from this evil that all other evils grow and multiply. In almost everything I've written there is a thread of this: a man's seemingly palpable need to dislike someone other than himself."

That's from 1967? No way, man.

Film Design: Matte Painting Concept Thumbnails

In late 1988 I designed some concepts for the (very) low budget feature film Johnny Shortwave (released in 1996). A few of these were 'optical matte painting' shots, an attempt by the producers to "open up" the film. Unfortunately, as was often the case with older low budget pictures, the wish to include matte shots was one of the first things to be jettisoned. And forget about hiring a matte artist when you have no money; he or she is of a very specialized craft and charges accordingly. (Now, of course, for relative peanuts one can whip up something on a computer. And now we can call on the help of A.I.)

Below are thumbnail sketches of ideas I had for extending the industrial areas of Toronto into an heavily industrialized state.

With the producers' blessing I rendered a larger concept painting. Johnny Shortwave was photographed in black and white, hence my monochrome still photograph.

To those (original series) Trekkies or Trekkers out there it's pretty obvious I was inspired by Albert Whitlock's paintings for Star Trek, specifically his artwork for the show's second pilot episode "Where No Man Has Gone Before".

When I look at that painting now, it gets me thinking that perhaps I should use if for something... something "weird and futuristic".

Postscript: Just a few years later I would work in 'opticals' as a compositor, at times combining a matte painting with a live-action element, with the feature film Darkman III: Die Darkman Die (1996) being but one example.